I’ve never found it incredibly easy to make new friends. I think that stems from two main reasons: my anxiety, and the fact that I’m just a bit of a loner by nature. I’m too much of a shy person to just go up to someone and start a conversation, it’s just not something I would do and I admire anyone who is actually able to do that. Now when I say I’m a bit of a loner by nature, I mean that I would much rather be at home on the sofa on a Friday night instead of being out drinking with people from work. I actually did a whole post on that topic which you can find here. It doesn’t mean I don’t want friends, but instead almost that I don’t really know what it’s like to have a lot of friends.
I think my problem is that I’ve never really had that close knit group of friends. You know, the group of girls that you’ve known since the first year of high school – you’ve grown up together, you know each other better than you know yourselves. I never had that growing up. Sure I had a group of friends in high school but to me it felt like we were only really “friends” because we were together for seven hours a day, five days a week and we just kind of had to get on. After high school I ended up not staying in touch with any of them and I was fine with that. Looking back I realised that a lot of the friendships I had at that time were actually toxic so… byeeee.
Over the last year or so, I’ve noticed that I’ve kind of kept myself in this bubble. A comfort bubble. A bubble that contains myself, Cam, my mum and maybe one or two friends from work. These were the only people I would really talk to outside of work or hang out with and for the longest time I was fine with that. I was comfortable with these people, they know me and I know them. It wasn’t until around the beginning of this year that I almost started to feel lonely. I started to crave more friendships, more people to hang out with, more people to Whats App when I find yet another slogan t-shirt on ASOS that I’m obsessed with. I guess that’s one of the main reasons I started blogging again – well actually, it was due to the fact that I really needed a hobby and I kinda missed it, but also because it’s such a good way to meet other people that are similar to me.
If you’ve not heard of the app “Bleet”, I sincerely recommend giving it a go if you’re a fellow blogger. It’s kind of like Tinder or Bumble but without the weirdos. It shows you other bloggers that are close by and “matches” you up with each other if you both “swipe right” essentially. By using Bleet, I’ve actually met a really great blogger pal called Lauren who lives super close to me and it turns out that we’re literally the same person to the point that it’s scary. I would never have met Lauren if it wasn’t for blogging and Bleet bringing us together and now I almost can’t imagine not knowing her! I’m so grateful that I’ve now got a best blogging friend that I can go out on cute mate dates with and take blog photos for each other – goals!
While I still don’t have a close group of friends or a “squad” as the kids call it these days, I feel like I’m making a step in the right direction. I’m talking to people more on Twitter, liking and commenting on more Instagram photos, or saying “omg I love your nails” to the girl serving me in Topshop – not that all of these things will immediately initiate a friendship but hey, baby steps for someone that spends their whole life under a duvet watching true crime documentaries.